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Old 01-10-2018, 11:14   #1
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Halloween Month VI: It Lives! Kind of...

Not sure I've got the time and/or energy for a full blown horror movie marathon month this year but I've got a bunch of crappy horror films stockpiled and a budding lust for time alone in a dark room watching people scream on a big screen...

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So comment here on what you will be watching/have just watched this October and/or what you think I should be watching instead of the crap I inevitably will be watching.
At the very least I'm gonna plough through Joe Bob Brigg's Last Drive-In, I think that's 13 flicks they showed. They missed a trick (or treat) not doing it at Halloween.

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Old 01-10-2018, 19:15   #2
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I'm off to a bad start......

#1 - Summer of 84 (2018)
Bunch of Stranger Things 80's kids on bikes think their police officer neighbour might be a serial killer. **** this movie. Seriously. **** it right in it's ear. Nothing happens for 90 mins while we're treated to a cynical cheap ass Canuck cash-in on the 80's nostalgia trend. No tension, no jeopardy, no sale. It manages to both look like it's trying too hard with it's spotless period t-shirts, unlikely posters and it's godawful intrusive as hell synth score and look like it's not trying hard enough when it comes to the actual plot which we've seen a million times before. That said the last 5-10 minutes threw in something a little different which was just waaaay too little waaaay too late. Avoid.
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Old 01-10-2018, 20:17   #3
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Old 01-10-2018, 22:12   #4
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Haha, he's back! And without a timely name change to GDPR79.

Do you have a Google Calendar entry set up for this time of the year?


Calibre (2018)
Quite traditional fair to begin my October, with this “folk horror” Netflix original.

Two friends embark on a weekend hunting in the highlands of Scotland – letting loose ahead of one of them becoming a father.

Being the flash city ******* that they are, they tear into what passes for the local nightlife – filling up on beer, whisky and cocaine. Before filling up one of the local ladies.

Hungover and tired, they set off on the hunt the next morning, where things start to go badly awry.

That’s the first 20 minutes and what follows is reliant mainly on paranoia and the unspoken customs of a tight knit village community, which have to be negotiated by our two guilt-ridden protagonists.

I quite liked this and its slow burn. It’s very handsomely shot, mixing predatorial woodland camera moves and panoramic vistas to good effect. The tension is ramped up very effectively in the last half hour and it’s interesting that unlike other films of this genre, you can possibly find some sympathy for the actions taken by the locals.



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Old 02-10-2018, 08:33   #5
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Welcome back, G! Hard to believe it's been a year already.

Tower of Evil (1972) – I was expecting some Hammer style claret & cleavage from this but was pleasantly surprised to find a particularly graphic (in both sex & violence terms) early British slasher. When a group of horny teenagers are found massacred on Snape Island (a fog enshrouded lighthouse rock), a second expedition arrives to investigate. The party consists of a group of wife swapping, dope smoking archaeologists (who do remarkably little archaeologising), the local ferrymen and a detective smart enough to detect that maybe the petite teenage girl sole survivor didn't have the strength to run through her male colleague and pin him to the wall with a massive solid gold Phoenician sword. An atmospheric and entertaining effort. The early 70’s fashion and dialogue are “far out, man!”.

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Adam: Where did you score the drugs?

Nora: Brought it with me, of course. Do you want to turn on?

Adam: (taking a huge drag on her proffered joint) No thanks. Got a feeling we’ll have to keep it together tonight.
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Old 02-10-2018, 12:04   #6
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^^ That's 2 flicks to add to my list already

Glad to see so many of the old posters are still around

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Do you have a Google Calendar entry set up for this time of the year?
Nah, I just get a familiar tingling in my balls

So I decided on a whim to watch the Saw flicks, I mean it's still one of the highest grossing horror movie series ever so I figure I should finally make it past part 3....

#2 - Saw (2004)
Westley from Princess Bride suffers an unfortunate DIY related injury. This holds up well after 14 years due to it's simplicity and the fun to be had in seeing Ben Linus from Lost scrapping with a just transitioning into his couldn't give a f--- years Danny Glover. My one complaint would be the awful (and truly hilarious) melodramatic acting Westley throws out near the end, but I can forgive that seeing as the whole flick was shot in 2 weeks or something like that. Also Jigsaw's reveal was pretty dumb, dude's neck must have been killing him.

#3 - He's Out There (2018)
Yvonne Strahovski and her two little girls head out to their regular family getaway cabin in the woods where they are terrorized by a guy in a mask with a big axe who they somehow haven't run into before despite him being around for years apparently. By the numbers predictable stalk and slash with added annoying little girls constantly screaming and washed out B-movie Canadian cinematography. Not terrible, far from great, here it comes; meh.
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Old 02-10-2018, 16:33   #7
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Hush (2016)
Last year I watched Don’t Breathe, which was a home invasion flick involving a blind man, so this time around it’s the turn of a home invasion film involving a deaf and mute lady.

It’s a short sharp piece which wastes little of its 80-minute runtime in getting to the action.

It holds some of the same crunchy, squelchy, brutal charms of the stalking scenes in the original Scream movie. With the masked killer taking delight in delivering a dozen knife wounds where a couple would’ve done the trick.

It’s a little unbelievable that a vulnerable deaf woman in America would take herself away to an isolated house in the woods, and not have a gun with her for emergencies such as this.
I won’t even take the bins out without a butcher’s knife in me sock!

But I digress. This pleasingly violent and twisty film comes recommended.

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Old 03-10-2018, 09:38   #8
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Pieces (1982) – A young lad somewhat overreacts to his mom chucking out his porn collection by chopping her up with an axe. Cut to 40 years later on a college campus full of horny teenagers where the disturbed individual decides he wants some head… and arms and legs. It’s up to tennis pro turned undercover cop Lynda Day George and Lothario student Ian Sera to solve the case before somebody starts to notice all the body parts pilling up. Juan Piquer Simon (Slugs!) delivers an entertaining giallo slasher full of stylish brutal murder, suspicious suspects aplenty, inept cops and total ‘WTF!?’ moments.

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Old 03-10-2018, 09:50   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WeaselFierce View Post
Pieces (1982) – A young lad somewhat overreacts to his mom chucking out his porn collection by chopping her up with an axe. Cut to 40 years later on a college campus full of horny teenagers where the disturbed individual decides he wants some head… and arms and legs. It’s up to tennis pro turned undercover cop Lynda Day George and Lothario student Ian Sera to solve the case before somebody starts to notice all the body parts pilling up. Juan Piquer Simon (Slugs!) delivers an entertaining giallo slasher full of stylish brutal murder, suspicious suspects aplenty, inept cops and total ‘WTF!?’ moments.
All I have in my head now is the constant screaming of "BAAAAAASSSSTTT****@@@@@@@DDDDD"
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Old 03-10-2018, 10:27   #10
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All I have in my head now is the constant screaming of "BAAAAAASSSSTTT****@@@@@@@DDDDD"
So many top quotes to choose from!
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Old 03-10-2018, 12:17   #11
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Oooh Pieces was one of Joe Bob's 13, I'll be watching it soon

Kicking off The Last Drive-In then with one I've never seen....

#4 - Tourist Trap (1979)
A group of young friends get a flat tire and end up off the beaten track at Chuck Connors roadside mannequin museum. Absolutely bonkers goings on here as we have to guess whether Chuck is a friendly old widower or a telekinetically enhanced killing machine. Pleasantly confusing in that we never can tell who's been killed or taken hostage? Is this real or psychotic fantasy? Why won't Tanya Roberts tits fall out of that scanty boob tube? Thoroughly enjoyed the atmosphere of late 70's slasher hokum and the final freeze frame is a memorable hoot! Bonus fun to be had of course with Joe Bob popping up regularly to take the p-ss and offer biographical info on the actors, especially Chuck.



#5 - The End? (2017) aka In un giorno la fine
Low budget Italian horror flick in which a dude is stuck in a lift during a zombie outbreak in his office building. Does just what it says on the tin. For all it's obvious budgetary limitations I actually really enjoyed this. Give it a go!



For whatever reason that one made me think of this one that I watched some months back and I would also recommend......



...Ray Stevenson in a lighthouse on an island besieged by cannibalistic fish people. There's some Shape Of Water style fish f---ing for people that like that kind of thing
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Old 03-10-2018, 12:45   #12
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Quote:
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Pieces (1982) – A young lad somewhat overreacts to his mom chucking out his porn collection by chopping her up with an axe.
I can't help feeling like you're judging the guy by modern standards here.
Sure, in the age of internet porn he's probably overreacted there, but a man's porn stash was sacrosanct in 1982!
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Old 03-10-2018, 18:16   #13
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...Ray Stevenson in a lighthouse on an island besieged by cannibalistic fish people. There's some Shape Of Water style fish f---ing for people that like that kind of thing
Somebody made a film about a Karl Pilkington-style mermaid.

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I can't help feeling like you're judging the guy by modern standards here.
Sure, in the age of internet porn he's probably overreacted there, but a man's porn stash was sacrosanct in 1982!
I was 10 in '82. I fully understand his trauma.
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Old 03-10-2018, 18:58   #14
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Squeezed another film in before the footy...


The Vault (2017)
I’d heard some quite negative things about this from a mainstream reviewer on Radio 5 Live (have I done a good job of protecting his identity there?) and I have to agree with those vibes sadly.

It starts off as a well-made and well-acted facsimile of Inside Man but it gets real hokey real quick and it’s just plain silly for the most part. It feels like it’s trying to do the From Dusk Till Dawn thing of hard-switching from one genre to another, but it’s an incompetent effort.

Think of it like Ghost Ship but set in a bank, and without that film’s most memorable kill to make the enterprise worthwhile.


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Old 03-10-2018, 19:19   #15
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Going to try and see horror films Ive not seen before and catch up with some Frightfest films Ive missed as well.

#1 - The Ritual
Based on the book by Adam Neville. Four blokes go hiking in Sweden after suffering a loss. It goes horribly wrong. Rafe Spall is watchable, Robert James Collier is the best of the four. Echoes of
. A few jumps but more about atmosphere than cheap scares. It builds up a tense atmopshere for most of the film but loses it a bit at the end with the reveal of

Also surprising that


#2 - We Are The Flesh
From a standard British horror to a bonkers Mexican horror film, literally one extreme to the other. Graphic gore, porn and
. I have no idea what was going on but it was certainly unsettling in its imagery and its use of sound. Not something I'll sit through again but certainly memorable.


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Think of it like Ghost Ship but set in a bank, and without that film’s most memorable kill to make the enterprise worthwhile.
/Adds to list

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Old 03-10-2018, 19:48   #16
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Squeezed another film in before the footy...


The Vault (2017)
I’d heard some quite negative things about this from a mainstream reviewer on Radio 5 Live (have I done a good job of protecting his identity there?) and I have to agree with those vibes sadly.

It starts off as a well-made and well-acted facsimile of Inside Man but it gets real hokey real quick and it’s just plain silly for the most part. It feels like it’s trying to do the From Dusk Till Dawn thing of hard-switching from one genre to another, but it’s an incompetent effort.

Think of it like Ghost Ship but set in a bank, and without that film’s most memorable kill to make the enterprise worthwhile.


Thought that sounded familiar, was one of last year's halloween month losers: https://forums.thedigitalfix.com/for...&postcount=122

#6 - Saw II (2005)
This time it's 8 people in a Jigsaw trap rigged house getting their deadly puzzle on. I actually thought this was an improvement over the first one. You get a bunch of awful people you can cheerily enjoy watching get f--ked over in creatively mean spirited ways; the needle pit is a personal wince inducing favourite that's stayed with me even 13 years later. Plus you get some comedy "serious acting" gold from Donnie Wahlberg as the equally unlikable protagonist. Bring on Part III.

I'm getting into the swing of horror month now, I might make it a full blown marathon yet!
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Old 04-10-2018, 13:02   #17
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#7 - What Still Remains (2018)
Post-post-apocalyptical tale in which a teen girl has to find her place in the world after her family die leaving her all alone in an isolated wilderness. Lucky for her then that hunky oirishman Colin O'Donoghue (Capt Hook from Once Upon A Time) wanders by and offers her a place over in his community. Or is it so lucky? Not a horror so much as a thriller. Don't expect to see any infected/zombies in this one, apparently that's all been dealt with (eh? I wanna see that movie) now we've just got two lots of religious cult's to be going on with. Plays out like a young adult novel, first in a series I'm guessing they're hoping. Passable.

#8 - Upgrade (2018)
Experimental computer chip gets implanted in quadriplegic allowing him to take revenge on those that f--ked him over. Futuristic action thriller ticks along nicely then BAM! a dude nearly gets his face ripped clean off and I check the IMDB info again, oh it's written/directed by Saw's Leigh Whannell, that makes sense. Original, fun, dark, no well known actors (other than the star of the flick who looks suspiciously like Tom Hardy's less intense younger brother). Looks to be set up for a sequel/series? And I'm OK with that for once. Recommended.



And while I'm at it, here's another one I watched a few months back that was pretty good...



...Martin Freeman versus zombies in the Aussie outback.
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Old 04-10-2018, 13:43   #18
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Elvira Mistress of the Dark (1988) – When I was young and my dad ever made the trip to the video rental store you could almost guarantee he would return with either this or Barbarian Queen. Haven't seen the film since those days but I really enjoyed revisiting it. Inheriting her great aunt’s house, Elvira shows up in town looking for a quick turnaround to get her the cash for a Vegas opening. The puritanical townsfolk and evil sorcerous uncle Morgan Shephard don't see her arrival in a good light. Cassandra Peterson is terrifically funny in her persona's movie debut, placing herself in various self-deprecating positions for comedic effect. For all her vampish, quippy persona she’s constantly likeable and her relationship with the town’s nice but dim hunk Bob is rather sweet. Shame it never spawned any sequels.

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Elvira: (looking at sacrificial pyre) Guess, we'll find out soon enough.
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Old 04-10-2018, 17:22   #19
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#8 - Upgrade (2018)
Experimental computer chip gets implanted in quadriplegic allowing him to take revenge on those that f--ked him over. Futuristic action thriller ticks along nicely then BAM! a dude nearly gets his face ripped clean off and I check the IMDB info again, oh it's written/directed by Saw's Leigh Whannell, that makes sense. Original, fun, dark, no well known actors (other than the star of the flick who looks suspiciously like Tom Hardy's less intense younger brother). Looks to be set up for a sequel/series? And I'm OK with that for once. Recommended.
Oooh! Thanks for the heads-up that this is available at home. I remember seeing the trailer and thinking it looked nifty. Added to the list!
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Old 04-10-2018, 18:26   #20
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#3 Demons (1985)
I'd never seen Demons before. Bonkers film thats both great (the premise, the makeup etc) and poor (the acting), and is such an incredibly 80's film (Go West on the soundtrack). For reasons never given a phantom of the opera style character gives out free tickets to a mystery film showing that goes horribly wrong...
Oh and enjoy the mid credits reveal. Probably the film ive most enjoyed of the three so far.

#4 Sadako vs Kayako
The Ring vs The Grudge basically in a Freddie vs Jason style face off. A lot of the set pieces from both series are reused in a greatest hits manner, (Sadako in todays society will only wait 48 hours now before coming for you instead of a week). A couple of cheap jump scares, the same cat one used twice, but its a fun film rather than a scary one. The ending was well done too as there was arguably only one way it could go.

Getting value for money from my free Shudder subscription which I got from here before it expires.
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