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Old 28-10-2020, 20:11   #181
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Got sucked into watching a non-horror tv show at the end of horror month

Dragged myself away for another fresh thru the door 88 films slasher...

#38 - Moon in Scorpio (1987)
Britt Ekland is the last survivor of her honeymoon yacht cruise in which the other 5 passengers were skewered by an escaped mental patient. She relates the muddled events in tiresomely voice-over narrated flashbacks that make no logical sense, incorporating her husband's Vietnam based atrocities and other events that she was not a part of. This was pretty awful and not in a good way. Obviously a troubled production that was re-edited probably more than once. Very disappointing, extremely dull. This has 3 commentary tracks? Really!? OK fine, but I'm only gonna listen to one of em dammit

I'm going to have to pick a few classic flicks I know are good that I haven't seen in ages to round out the month.
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Old 28-10-2020, 21:48   #182
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#18 - Friday the 13th (2009)


“You won’t be disappointed. They don’t call me The Wood Wizard because I masturbate a lot”


I never watched this at the time of release because of the uniformly poor reviews, but with a little over 10 years to marinate, and with no cinematic appearance from Jason since then, I figured I should give it my attention.

So, just to catch you up (because **** me I wish someone had done me that favour) Jason is a triathlete now. Legs it round like there’s a gold medal on the line, loves a bit of archery. Y’know, all the outdoors pursuits.

And he’s methodical as **** now. Keeps the bulbs in the Crystal Lake floodlights in good order and does due diligence whenever he finds a clue that there might be a nearby douchebag in need of slaughtering.

So we get silicone masquerading as boobies, we get a sleeping bag kill to honour Jason X, we get lots of ubiquitous machete work, we get some weed-taking idiots and expendable hicks, but it’s all in the unappealing washed out and poorly lit style of Platinum Dunes. Zero personality or creativity.

It’s not awful in the same way as the Krueger abortion that came a year later was, but it’s just super weird how much it looks like a Friday 13th film without ever feeling like one.

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Old 28-10-2020, 23:08   #183
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I'm going to have to pick a few classic flicks I know are good that I haven't seen in ages to round out the month.
Having fallen a good way behind the target number, I think that's my plan too.

I made the mistake of watching **** loads of horror films in September, which obviously don't qualify for this event, so now I'll have to hammer the likes of Poltergeist and The Thing if I'm to stand any chance.
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Old 29-10-2020, 00:27   #184
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#19 – Nobody Sleeps In The Woods Tonight (2020)


“Fifteen thousand people disappear in Poland each year. A third of them in the woods”



This Netflix effort comes to us from our Central European neighbours and is an immediately refreshing offering for that alone.

It does a fine job early on of establishing just how isolated the environment is, presenting an overhead shot of a bus heading into an endless ocean of trees, with no sign of civilisation in any direction. It’s beautifully shot and while not being by any stretch an artsy film, it still finds time for some pleasingly unexpected time-lapse shots of a spider wrapping up its prey or maggots devouring a carcass. Low on bombast and high on creepiness.

At its core though this is a deformed lunatic slasher film and presents like a homage to the American classics. The modern excuse for getting these teens out in the woods is that they’re delinquents who’ve been sent to a camp that bans all electronic devices. So they all have their mobile phones and iPods taken off them, which of course helps the film with the modern problem of potential victims having constant access to the police.

It still has the same tropes as traditional horror films – the nerd, the jock, the pretty blonde, etc. - but it was fun seeing another country’s take on things, with everything feeling a little more organic and less staged.

You might notice that I haven't mentioned the sweet sweet kills yet. And that’s because they’re a disappointment. Lots of off camera stuff with blood splats on walls but nothing particularly explicit or entertaining. I guess it’s maybe a budgetary issue but with the rest of the film looking so good, it’s a real shame that it ends up being so dry, despite Netflix’s misguided 18 rating.


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Old 29-10-2020, 09:53   #185
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One Missed Call 3: Final (2006)
Following the attempted suicide of one of their bullied classmates, the remaining students come under threat of the cell phone curse while on a school trip to Korea. Completely ignoring everything from the previous film, this one feels like those low budget Hellraiser sequels where they just crowbarred Pinhead into somebody else's script. There's an interesting concept at the heart of this, those who receive the call can die or forward it to another classmate who will die instead. This sets up the dynamic where all the bullying assholes are turning on each other left and right. Apart from a couple of decent death scenes though much of this looks cheap and lacks real atmosphere. Also, when a ddos attack is used to block a vengeful spirit, I think you've really jumped the shark.
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Old 29-10-2020, 12:48   #186
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#18 - Friday the 13th (2009)

So we get silicone masquerading as boobies
Say what you like about this movie, but Julianna Guill is all natural & quite spectacular.
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Old 29-10-2020, 12:51   #187
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Rogue (2020)
A team of mercenaries led by Megan Fox (!) find themselves in a world of trouble when their mission goes awry & they're hunted by an extremist group & a very ****** off lion. Fox is surprisingly good, the supporting cast is pretty decent & the action's nicely handled & quite bloody. The only real let-downs are the rubbish main badguy (who's from London for no apparent reason) & some ropey CGI on the lion. Way, way better than I expected. Liked it.
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Old 29-10-2020, 19:13   #188
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#39 - Channel Zero: Candle Cove (2016, 6 part mini-series)
Psychiatrist goes back to his hometown to solve the mystery of the killing of 5 children including his twin brother 30 years previously. This was really good, felt like proper old school Stephen King. Lots of very effective creepiness and it was quite refreshing that it wasn't drenched in 80's nostalgia despite the abundance of flashbacks. Thanks for the reccie

If you're late to the party like me give it a go, recommended!



Jumped right into Lovecraft Country after; episode one had me hooked by the midway point and the mention of Herbert West Re-Animator, the fun ending was just shoggoth flavoured icing on the cake, looks to be a quality HBO production

Right, time for some classic horror...
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Old 29-10-2020, 19:43   #189
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Is anyone going to brave The Craft: Legacy?

I really don't want to, so if one of you could take that bullet please.
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Old 30-10-2020, 00:00   #190
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Ghost Watch
I've just watched this BBC investigation into an alleged haunted house, screened 'live' on Halloween in 1992 and apparently never repeated. It's obviously scripted, but though I missed the original broadcast I can see why, in the dark days of almost 30 years ago, it might have fooled a few people (the switchboards went wild afterwards). It (intentionally) takes a long time to properly get going, but it's still bloody spooky. A tiny part of me might be thinking of sleeping with a light on tonight, but I will resist.

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Old 30-10-2020, 00:26   #191
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Ghost Watch
I've just watched this BBC investigation into an alleged haunted house, screened 'live' on Halloween in 1992 and apparently never repeated. It's obviously scripted, but though I missed the original broadcast I can see why, in the dark days of almost 30 years ago, it might have fooled a few people (the switchboards went wild afterwards). It (intentionally) takes a long time to properly get going, but it's still bloody spooky. A tiny part of me might be thinking of sleeping with a light on tonight, but I will resist.
I reviewed this on a previous thread and I watched it live as a twelve year old in 1992, with my equally terrified siblings.

I'm glad you still found that Pipes had the power to disturb all these years later.
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Old 30-10-2020, 00:31   #192
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#20 - 1BR (2019)

“Welcome to the community”



Sarah moves to Los Angeles to get some distance from her father after the death of her mother from cancer.

She has vague plans to start a new life and enrol in some kind of college programme but her new apartment, which seemed so perfect when she found it, is keeping her awake at night. The pipes are noisy, her cat has gone missing and one of her neighbours is creeping her out with his insistence on offering her reading material on the benefits of community spirit. Plus he’s got an eye patch so, y’know, keep your fu*king distance and don't leave your drink unattended.

She tries to ignore the problems and makes a new friend at her temporary office job but everything continues to unravel and her feelings of unease start to become only too justified.

I don’t want to say much more about the plot but wow, I thought this was really great. The acting is on point from everyone, the claustrophobic presentation keeps you wary and it conjures the feeling of one of those great 1970s movies about paranoia, the need to fit in and the secrets behind the fragile respectability of serving the common good.

Highly recommended.

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Old 30-10-2020, 09:19   #193
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The Babysitter: Killer Queen (2020)
Two years after the events of the last movie, Judah Lewis is still the laughing stock of the school and tagged as crazy to boot when all the evidence conveniently disappeared. An escape to a lake party doesn't go as planned when he finds himself in the same situation again. Almost literally! Leaning far too hard on the reset button this sequel relies on an unsatisfactory hook to get us back into the action while rehashing way too much from the original, sans any of the actual tension. On the positive side though, Lewis remains an awkward but very likeable lead, and there's still enough humorous lines and splattery deaths to keep me amused. Also more Ken Marino is not a bad thing.
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Beetlejuice (1988)
Geena Davis and Alec Baldwin's idyllic life in their dream home is cut short by their untimely deaths. Their real woes don't begin though until their home is sold and they are forced to endure the afterlife with mopey goth Winona Ryder and her family. Their plight puts them in the sights of disgraced, psychotic bio-exorcist Michael Keaton who offers to rid of their pesky living tenants. Haven't watched this for decades so interesting to revisit it. The view of the afterlife with its numerous wonderful sight gags is fantastic. And Keaton's performance as Betelgeuse is a tornado of in your face comic energy every time he's on screen. Unfortunately, that's not much of the running time and the rest of the movie pales in comparison.
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Old 30-10-2020, 12:00   #194
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Another 12 year old traumatized by Ghost Watch here (I had tuned into it for Craig Charles)

I'm hesitant to ever watch it again just cos I know it will look cheap n terrible.

Oooh that 1BR looks interesting, added to my list, cheers.

#40 - An American Werewolf in London (1981)
Couple of American backpackers end up in the wrong place at the wrong time. In before the remake! I hadn't seen this in an unforgivably long time, probably VHS or maybe one of the first DVD releases (oooh myyyy look at all the extras on this blu). Loved it then, think I might love it even more now. It's not a perfect horror movie (like say The Thing) but it's flaws don't bother me because it's just so damn fun to watch. Well it is now, as a child I was petrified. The dream sequence with the bed in the woods, the painful transformation and the guy running thru the maze-like corridors of the tube station are scarred into my psyche. That stuff still works now of course but from Rik Mayall & Mr Rottweiler (Brian Glover) in the pub to the Frank Oz (and the muppets) cameo by way of the porn cinema finale it's all a far more entertaining experience. If you've never seen this, seriously, what are you waiting for.

Trying to decide if I should sully my last days of Halloween with American Werewolf in Paris now
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Old 30-10-2020, 15:33   #195
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Trying to decide if I should sully my last days of Halloween with American Werewolf in Paris now
Ordinarily, I'd say no, because it's terrible. But I really want to hear you rip it to shreds.
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Old 30-10-2020, 15:41   #196
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The Monster Squad (1987)
A bunch of horror-obsessed kids go up against Dracula, Frankenstein's monster, the Wolfman, the Mummy and the Creature from the Black Lagoon (or 'Gill-man' because they couldn't get the rights) in director Fred Dekker & co-writer Shane Black's loving homage to the old Universal classics.

For some reason I missed out on this one as a kid of the VHS era, & when I finally caught up with it on DVD in 2007 I kinda wondered what all the fuss was about. But it's grown on me tremendously over the years & is now a firm favourite. The kids aren't too irritating, the creature make-up & effects are top-notch, the script is sharp & witty, & at only 82 minutes it doesn't outstay its welcome. Perfect halloween viewing.

& after watching that, I was pleased to find this:

Wolfman's Got Nards (2018)
Documentary about the making & legacy of The Monster Squad & what it means to be a cult movie, directed by its star, Andre Gower, & featuring interviews with the cast, writers, director, FX crew & a few rabid fans. Very nicely put together & very very entertaining. If you're a fan of the film, highly recommended.


Goosebumps 2: Haunted Halloween (2018)
The creepy ventriloquist doll from the first movie is back, this time looking for a family - & if he can't join yours, he's gonna make his own. Much the same as the first one really: Kids let monsters escape from book, monsters create havoc in small town, kids end up saving the world. It's not bad, but the kids are all very bland & I didn't really care what happened to any of them. On the plus side, the visual effects are all quite excellent & occasionally very inventive, & Jack Black puts in an uncredited cameo as Goosebumps author R.L. Stine. It passed 90 minutes quite painlessly, but was nowhere near as entertaining as the first film.
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Old 30-10-2020, 16:26   #197
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Another 12 year old traumatized by Ghost Watch here (I had tuned into it for Craig Charles)

I'm hesitant to ever watch it again just cos I know it will look cheap n terrible.
It does look cheap and terrible, just like most BBC productions of the period, and the low resolution of the DVD didn't help there. I wouldn't heap praise on that aspect of it. What lets it down more than anything is the actors trying not to look like actors - the studio expert in particular, who unfortunately gets a lot of screen time. Parky, Charles and Sarah Greene come out of it well, but Mike Smith is oddly stiff playing Mike Smith. But when it tried to spook me, it did. I think I'm quite hard to please when it comes to this sort of thing, so I was happy to put up with a bit of Beeb cheapness for the unease I felt for some time afterwards (though I did go to bed with the lights off, and after a few shots of rum I reckoned I could have handled Pipes). I first saw this about 10 years ago, and wonder how I would have viewed it on broadcast, when I was a lot older than 12. I think I would have still spotted the poor non-acting - and equally sure it would have put the wind up me.
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Old 30-10-2020, 16:54   #198
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Halloween 2 officially opened on October 30th 1981 but was already selling out advanced screenings on the 29th.
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Old 30-10-2020, 19:24   #199
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If you can find a spare hour and a half in your busy Halloween schedules I'd heartily recommend His House, a haunted house story that breathes a bit of life into an overstuffed genre. Excellent performances (Sope Dirisu and Wunmi Mosaku, Matt Smith in support) and some arresting visuals - with the usual bumps in the night, of course - elevate it way above the norm. On Netflix.
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Old 30-10-2020, 19:35   #200
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^^ Just beat me to it!

#41 - His House (2020)
Pair of African immigrants are assigned a haunted council house in London and aren't allowed to leave lest they be deported. That's the basic setup but there's a lot more to it thankfully. Sope Dirisu (Elliot from the cracking Gangs of London) is excellent here as is Wunmi Mosaku (just been watching her in Lovecraft Country). Some striking imagery, creepy spooks and a surprisingly refreshing take on the usual haunted house genre make for recommended Halloween viewing. I guess my one gripe would be that they kind of club you over the head with the metaphor of refugees trying to overcome their psychological (as well as physical) trauma and find a fresh start in a new culture, not really complaining it was just a bit too on the nose by the end.

P.S. I saw Monster Squad when I was a lad but I never really got the love for it back then either, I remember it as being The Goonies meets The Universal Monsters and just as cheesy as it sounds (was the old fella from V in it?) - the doc looks good tho.
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